Today on Stacks, we have a guest post from Jared, a husband and father of three who likes loud music and loud laughter.
When we enter the world of art, we are at war and our choices can either be an act of brilliant heroism or pathetic cowardice. When you look back at the music you have listened to, are you filled with the pride a veteran might have for the medals he’s won, or do you quietly brush off your associations with the bands you used to listen to?
I first saw action in the summer of 1989 at a Kmart. My mother said I could pick a CD to buy since I had been less dickish than usual about buying school clothes that year, trying on all my trousers to make sure everything fit and enduring a seemingly endless inspection of each pair from my mother. After doing my time in the boy’s department, I went by myself to rifle through the CDs, which were warehoused in long cardboard boxes in the middle of the store. After looking for a few minutes, I soon found myself standing there with two CD’s in my hands — The Cure’s, Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me and Milli Vanilli’s Girl You Know It’s True — and, at that moment in time, I could have gone either way.
Now, how can I explain how a boy could hold these two CDs in his hands and value them equally? At fourteen, I was completely self-taught and naive. My parents were not cool or artsy or anything. My dad had a reel-to-reel tape deck with some early 60’s pop rock that he turned on once a year while we put up the Christmas tree and my mom listened to Crystal Gale, Kenny Rogers and The Oak Ridge Boys on an 8-track in our conversion van when she ran errands. Although I fondly remember all the words to The Oak Ridge Boys’ “Elvira,” I was not satisfied.
The previous Christmas, “Santa” (I was the oldest of seven) brought me a wonderful present that would later prove to be the most influential gift I have ever received — a JVC boom box that had a CD player on the top and a tape deck that could record music off the radio. I lived in the middle of the woods in Pennsylvania and I was only able to get two stations. One was WNNK 104 FM, a top 40 station that introduced me to Milli Vanilli, Bobbi Brown and Poison. The other was a college radio station from Dickinson College that played bands like The Trashcan Sinatras, R.E.M. and Jane’s Addiction. I spent hours listening to and taping songs from both stations. And, so it was that at the critical moment in Kmart, things could have gone either way — safe and predictable with pop music or towards something darker, mysterious and dangerous. By then, I knew that conforming to norms would make for an easier assimilation into my small rural high school, but somehow I acted with great courage and put down that Milli Vanilli CD and, without any malice towards Rob and Fab, decided the prophet I would follow would be Robert Smith.
Nothing was further from the realities of my life in farm town USA than the exotic sounds of English music like The Smiths and anything from the NETWORK industrial label. The bands that really captured my imagination were The Cure, The Dead Milkmen, The Smiths, Nitzer Ebb,Skinny Puppy and Jesus and the Mary Chain. Listening to college radio made me feel inspired and moved me to acts of musical heroism. I weathered teasing from my classmates and spent my weekends searching record stores for CD’s to buy, venturing hours away from my hometown to big cities like Baltimore and Philadelphia in search of college music. Without older siblings or friends to guide me, I bravely took risk after risk, buying any album put out by certain labels, or just going with my gut. I found myself the champion of obscure bands and unpopular choices, bands that imploded after a few albums or went unloved by the masses. In the battle for my soul, college music won and I found my cause.
“The bands that really captured my imagination were The Cure, The Dead Milkmen, The Smiths, Nitzer Ebb,Skinny Puppy and Jesus and the Mary Chain.”
I think we must be living parallel music lives. Just add Depeche Mode, Eurasure, Yaz, Ministry, Front 242, Devo, Black Flag, and the Dead Kennedys. I remember going to the mall at some point in high school after having just made a little money, determined to pick up a couple new CDs and having no clue what to buy. After what was probably an hour or so, I ended up with Siouxsie and the Banshees (basely solely on the cool album cover) and Bow Wow Wow (for reasons I can’t remember now). Turned out to be a damn fine day.
As Jared’s spokesperson, I can say that all of those bands were/are on his list as well. In fact, he likes to say that he knew he wanted to marry me a few days after we met because I knew all the words to “Chickens**t Conformist.”
I totally relate to taping things off of the radio, but I was not so sophisticated to have a CD player!
Oh yea, the Cure, The Smiths, Depeche Mode, Eurasure – – Randy – how did you remember YAZ?!!! I’d add Echo and the Bunnymen, Human League, OMD, UB40, Soft Cell, and Spandau Ballet. Then, I grew up and found Bono and Sting and it just wasn’t ever the same again – – –
Wow, okay. This is so full of emotional and associative triggers. Really enjoyed it, Jared — and thanks for sharing, Heidi!
I have The Cure and The Smiths tracked-up right now. So much for productivity. “And, so it was that at the critical moment in Kmart, things could have gone either way – safe and predictable with pop music or towards something darker, mysterious and dangerous.” How to explain the magnetism of dark, mysterious and dangerous? It’s the fountain of youth.
This is heroism of one of the most important varieties! We all need more heroes like Jared in our lives – because music can save us. A lot of days, it saves me.
I remember finding my Mum’s old Pioneer tape deck, and setting it up in my bedroom, age 13. The local radio station was always on, and I taped cassettes that would bring my favourite sounds together. Back then it was Oasis, or Blur, or Supergrass. Nothing very heroic on my part… but since then I’ve branched out into the sounds of forsaken prophets, as you describe.
These sounds – for me, today – are the original and idiosyncratic mixtapes and mashups that surface – and just as quickly fade away – on various blogs across the internet. I love the freshness of the remix, and its creative, ‘textual’ structure. Like the prophets of old, they quote the words of prophets before them. Here are a couple of my faves:
http://www.dadalife.com/
http://www.sundtrak.com/
There is certainly something magical about finding the music that speaks to you in your youth, nothing compares! I have recently been grieving this very thing. Although I’m only 32, I’m a full-time working mom living in a conservative, unimaginative community. I don’t pay as much attention to new music as I used to. My subscriptions to Spin and Rolling Stone have long-expired, replaced by “Parenting” (how could I resist? Couponing made it only $3.99 for the whole year!) and my husband’s “Backpacker”. At work I supervise a 19 year-old young lady who requested 2 days off next month so she and her husband could go see their “most favorite band in the whole world”, playing in Seattle. I dared to ask who they were going to see, and she explained the history of her husband’s zeal for Bayside, and she asked – “Have you heard of them?” I was almost embarrassed to say that no, I hadn’t, although I threw in the caveat that I think the name does ring a bell. And at that moment I was saddened to realize that I am no longer that girl who one night traveled to Boise and back (5 hours each way) on a whim to see a show just because my friend wanted to go (Weezer, in case you were wondering). I’ve spent a lot of time searching out the best live shows, or new music, but it hasn’t even crossed my mind in years. Then I realize that I stick with those same tunes that spoke to me when I was 16, cuz they still speak to me. I may not have the time or need to sit in my room listening to Tori Amos while writing in my journal. But she still gets frequent play on my iPod while I work in my office, because I have the same emotional responses. And that’s ok – I’m in good company. (And Jared, we ALL really liked Milli Vanilli)
I mentioned Jared’s purchasing dilemma to my husband, and he recounted a similar turning point when he was trying to decide on buying Guns ‘n Roses or Eazy E.
Awesome! My brother’s was Nine Inch Nails and Vanilla Ice. He bought the NIN, although, he has, in fact, become a white rapper.
During the Christmas that I was in 5th grade, I was the proud recipient of Whitesnake, Tiffany and Whitney Huston, but my heart really belonged to Les Miserables and Phantom of the Opera. I pretty much went from theater nerd to Violent Femmes and They Might Be Giants, which I’ve always thought of as the gateway bands to alternative music.
What? No George Strait? Kylie Minogue? Rancid? Or Lex de Azevedo?
Can you follow “Clear Blue Sky” up with “Time Bomb”? Or “Near My God to Thee” with “Fever”? How about rocking out with “Stockholm Syndrome” and then kicking back with “Redneck Yacht Club”?