I Am

“And God said unto Moses, I Am That I Am: and he said, Thus shalt thou say unto the children of Israel, I Am hath sent me unto you.” Exodus 3:14

Sandy Hook Elementary

December 14, 2012

I Am the pretty little blonde haired, blue eyed girl with the captivating smile who loves the color pink and loves taking care of her two little sisters.

I Am the brave teacher who lied about where her students were. I am young and in love. I am looking forward to spending Christmas with my boyfriend who has a surprise for me.

I Am the principal of Sandy Hook Elementary with a long career in education. I have dedicated my life to creating an environment of excellence and achievement for the children in my school.

I Am the policeman entering the school in disbelief and shock at what has occurred. I have relatives at the school and I know many of the children’s families.

I Am the retired psychologist who found a group of traumatized children huddled together and crying in front of my house. I comforted them, invited them into my home where they hugged teddy bears and talked about what they had just witnessed.

I Am the shy, awkward young man with automatic rifles entering the school with the intention of killing as many people as possible. I have no friends. I am terrified and angry because my mother is making arrangements to put me in a psychiatric hospital. I want to exact justice on a world that has no place for me, a world that hates me as much as I hate myself.

I Am his mother trying to get through each day. I devoted my life to my successful, wealthy husband who is now married to another woman. I raised my bright successful oldest son and am trying to manage the life of my mentally ill youngest son. I am terrified of being poor.

I Am God opening his arms widely to bring these people into his presence. Tears are running down my face; there is so much suffering in the world. When will my children learn that they belong to one other?

–by Debbie