By Dan
A long favorite movie scene of mine comes near the close of “Saving Private Ryan.” Capt. John Miller, the character played by Tom Hanks, lies dying in the street, having just held off a German onslaught on a small French town. He pulls Matt Damon’s Private Ryan character in close and — with his dying breath — tells Ryan to “Earn This.”
While the point of the scene — and the movie in general — speaks to the sometimes awful randomness of life and war, I was reminded of the concept in an entirely different setting. Sitting in Sunstone West last month in Palo Alto, Calif., I was fortunate enough to catch the closing session, which involved a panel of gay Mormons who spoke about their difficulties following the battle over the infamous Proposition 8. While every presentation was excellent, I found myself particularly moved by the words of Mitch Mayne, a San Francisco businessman who self-identifies as a “gay, active Mormon.” After sharing some of his experiences working to bridge the gap between gay and straight members of the LDS Church, he shared his testimony of the powerful, healing love of the Savior and the meaning of the Sacrament.
Why I was so moved, practically to tears (very uncommon for me), left me surprised. His words alone were not terribly different from what I could have heard in any LDS testimony meeting from any LDS member. They would likely not have stood out to me then. Why now? Why this man?
Driving home that night, the thought occurred to me that perhaps I was more moved by Brother Mayne’s testimony because it felt ‘earned’. I found myself both mystified and touched that a man could maintain such a belief in a religion that was largely rejecting him. I found myself pondering my own attachments to the faith, which in large part stem from watching my inactive mother and non-member father eventually meld their paths together. There is power in struggle. That power came through Brother Mayne’s words, words that he did not simply inherit. Words that he had earned.
My own struggles are of a different sort. I don’t have a traditional LDS testimony, and likely never will. My inner cynic often wins out over the inner idealist. I tend to think of what’s doable rather than what is possible. I often find my focus is to survive, rather than thinking of how to thrive. Where my path will take me — faith-wise — remains unclear. My only hope is that, someday, I can share insight with the same power that Brother Mayne shared his. Will I earn it?
Thanks for this, Dan. I think you’ve hit on a beautiful aspect of the repetitive testimony meeting formula – that although ‘words are cheap’, saying the same testimonies highlights the powerful examples that lie behind them. When I hear someone I respect and love share their conviction, that life shines through more brightly than the words themselves.
Perhaps this could be an argument for accepting the (surely perpetual) conditions for oppositional experiences within the Church? Man-made laws and policies are hard and blunt… but, it has to be admitted, they necessitated the formation of the moral authority and power of Mitch Mayne’s testimony.
Dan, very thought-provoking post. Do you think there is a difference between “earning” a testimony and “owning” your testimony? As my faith has evolved, I’ve found myself rejecting dualistic notions of God, wherein human beings are, by their sinful nature, separate from God. I still think we separate ourselves from God, but more because we forget or lose track of our divine nature. As such, talk of earning gets me a bit itchy, but I understand that it might be merely a semantic argument.
Wow, thanks Dan. This gives me some insight into why I never could get behind the ‘fake it until you make it’ testimonies born of “a testimony is found in the bearing of it” advice. While I agree that we start believing something if we repeat it often enough, we don’t FEEL it- we don’t become it, we don’t earn it. And it’s easy to peel off once the crack starts.
I loved this post. Thanks Dan.
Thanks for sharing this. I can relate to being really touched by people who have really “earned” their testimonies.
He said, “Earn this” to Matt Damon, who was being enjoined to make this sacrifice count by dedicating his life to ‘earningi it. Just how Damon would do that is in question, since at the film’s end Damon asks his wife whether he had led a good life, or had been ‘a good man’. A better solution for a mankind IS this:
For God so loved the world that He gave His Only Begotten Son that whosoever believes on HIM should not perish but have Everlasting Life. John 3:16
Salvation, ultimately cannot be earned by any works or good deeds but only by doing what John 3:16 enjoins us to do. One’s Eternal Destiny depends on it.
Jesus Christ is Lord, God, Messiah and Coming King.
The rapture of all true believers just before the Great Tribulation … is imminent. Accept Him asap . . . today.
Maranatha